My over-arching Mission Statement for raising my children was this simple mantra: Keep the Kid Alive. I felt that if I could manage that one thing I would have fulfilled my most important role in their lives. All the rest could only be based on that beginning - helping them to grow and learn, to be happy and content adults - whatever it is that is important to you for your kids to have from you, it all has to start with being alive.
Keeping the Kid Alive is a never-ending, daily, conscious activity. I have spent thousands of hours while raising my children trying to anticipate situations that could bring harm to them. This blog is actually for my grandchildren; I don't want my children to have to re-invent the wheel, so to speak, when they have their children. In a sense, this is my attempt to Keep the (grand)Kid Alive! I hope you will find some tips and tricks here to help you keep your little ones that little bit safer under your care. I would love it if you would send in your tips that you don't see listed here - information gathering is KEY in KKA!
I'm going to start off with my number one, most critical, key KKA tip: Raise your Own Children. Yep, I know that is a somewhat controversial thing to say. But before you race to leave a comment as to how wrong-sounding that is, please consider these two questions, truthfully: Would you step in front of a speeding car to save your own child? Would you step in front of a speeding car to save another woman's child?
My answers? I personally would cut my heart out if my child needed one, of course I would step in front of a speeding car. But I would not do it for another woman's child. My children need me, they are my responsibility to keep alive, and it would be wrong and practically immoral to endanger myself if it were not benefiting them directly. I doubt that many women who already have children can or would answer differently than I just did. So the question becomes pretty clear, if you are looking at it from a logical, cold, rational perspective: Your children are safer under your care than anywhere else.
I am not going to bring any other considerations such as employment, affordability, or women's right to choose to work into the discussion. The speeding car (this is a metaphor) just doesn't care.
If you place your child in stranger care you have to know that your children just aren't going to be as safe as if they are home with you. That isn't me judging you, because I'm not. However I really need to put it out there to think about because in our society that little idea has become taboo. So, I'll say it louder and once again: Your children are safer under your care than anywhere else.
We have raging guilt as a society for having shipped our children off to "do time" in day care, as evidenced by our Mommy War meltdowns every time someone criticizes a mother for working or not working. What is fueling that guilt and those melt downs is the fact that we have forbidden ourselves to think or say this truth that we know in our guts, and we are suffering the classic effects of denial. It doesn't need to be this way. Sure, we have a lot to change in society to make it a place where children can once again grow up in their own homes, but it is worthy work.
KKA tip #1: Children Should Be Raised At Home By Their Own Parents.
